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Sunday, March 26, 2006



爱是个什么东西?

走遍这城市
找个没你的角落
混乱的心要一点冷静

分手说不定
是现在最好的解脱
该对爱喊个暂停

Some things written by different people has brought some reflection into my mind.

1:
" like is like. love is love ...... ANYBODY has the chance to develop to love ...... when u're very stubborn on one person even when he's not meant for u, u should open ur eyes n open ur heart, mayb somewhere else, something good is happening :)"

(unrelated to 1) 2:
"Perhaps if time could wash away all emotions, maybe you never really understood what is it like to truly love some one. The concept that mere time can eradicate your pinings somehow cheapens the sanctity and magnminity of love? For those who share my sentiments, perhaps what time has done for us is build a paper dam. Dimensions? Time and space ...... Perhaps life would be less fulfilling but less painful, to be able to change partners like underwear. But alas, ye Ol' curse called Love befalls thee!)"

怎么try
心里还是搞不懂
想去爱
但又怕被爱伤害

不明白
怎么样才会满足
don't know why
想走又离你不开

In an ideal world,

A loves B. B loves A. Their feelings are clear. Only A and Only B. A and B make their feelings completely known to one another, and they get together. There are no external factors affecting their decision. There are no clashes of wealth, parents, religion, hobbies, time, distance etc. They are completely compitable. Even not so initially, they can iron out all differences. A will never ever entertain thoughts that other people might be better than B. Likewise for B. They will never break up. A will only like B and only B for the rest of his life. Likewise for B.

AND.... *drumrolls*............






They live happily ever after.

But is it ever possible?

爱是个什么东西?
它到底公不公平?

爱有什么了不起?
有没有都是可以

HELL NO!!

It's rather impossible to eradicate the dilemmas and uncertainties in love.

Sentimental Memories (old) vs Current possiblities (New)
Feelings (whether u like the person) vs Practicalities (wealth, religion, parents, distance etc)
Very Close Friends v Lovers

希望这一切
只是迷茫过度期
爱和情欲交战在心底

锁定一颗心
没有想象中那么容易
安定后就不安定

Back to the paragraphs.

1 is a practical one. Open your heart, open your mind. See, look and listen to the people around you. Someone might be waiting all along!

2 is a sentimetal one. If I fall in and out of love so easily, then what is love?

Well, both are correct I guess.

怎么try
有时心会被摇动
想去爱
但是又不敢去爱
我明白
你的沉默你的痛
i know why
但不知道要怎么去改

It led to me thinking.

爱是个什么东西?

Do you like a person first, then think of the practical stuff, or do you first set up a 'practicalilties/possibilties filter', then 'decide' whether you like the person?

The idealistic and 'always appear in love stories' advice would be, "Just follow your heart. The other pieces will fall into place."

Is it really so simple?

If it's the former, should you still perservere even if it's a lost cause? Yes, you can called that true, steadfast, undying love, but is it practical at all? Wouldn't that just create more misery for both parties?

If it's the latter, it's darn well practical and logical, but wouldn't it degrade the idealistic and noble notion of love?

爱是个什么东西?
它是太理想主义

爱有什么了不起?
我充满许多怀疑

This is the kind of dilemma that exists.

(Pls do not take offence if you're in a similiar case)

I've seen people liking one particular person for 3 yrs, 6yrs, or even 8 yrs, despite knowing it's rather impossible for them to get together, and just clinging on for the hope that they might get together someday.. Is this true love, or pure foolishness?

I've seen people getting a new bf/gf immediately after breaking up with their previous ones.

I've seen people get together with a new bf/gf, then when the ex-bf/gf comes calling again, he/she returns to the ex.

I've seen people first stating he/she likes A, but when it seems that it's rather hard to be with A, and when B comes calling, he/she jumps ship immediately and got together with B.

I've seen people get together just after a few weeks and even a few days of friendship. After A has confessed his/her liking for B, B will somehow think "Hmm, A is not bad..." and 'adapt' his/her thinking and like A. Previously, A is just one of the many options B thinks as a possible bf/gf. However, after the confession, B shuts down other options and decides to be with A.

So for cases 2, 3, 4 and 5, it's first acessing the practicalities of things before 'deciding' to like a person.

This is darn practical, but do you call that true love?

Or even do you call that truly liking a person?

Or it's just a marriage of convenience?

Is liking the person who likes you the easy way out if you do not know who to choose?

So do you choose someone you only 'half-like' because you feel that you're not good enough for the one you really like?

Practicalities Practicalities.

'I have a reason for doing that', they claimed.

But are the reasons reasonable enough? I wonder.

Even though I'm guilty too.

So, for now, do you keep a buffet-style on things?
Meaning you keep your options open, and pick the 'dish that somehow arrives on your plate'

Or do you do an a la carte?
Meaning your order what you want to eat.
The chef might not neccessarily want to cook that dish for you though.

The dilemma of feelings vs practicalities again.

难道我全做错?
能否重新来过?
爱能给我多少宽容?

I still engage in sentimental thoughts. There are certain things I have never been able to put off, although now it's more of a sub-conscious thing.

I won't 读书想着你, 听歌想着你, 大地和蓝天, 出现的全是你, but somehow it is impossible to feel totally normal when I see some people.

Circumstances do change, making it impossible to chase causes that are lost.

But sentiments don't.

Then with this emotional baggage inside me, it is possible to find someone I truly love?

If I were to go into a relationship, I know I would NEVER go and think about other girls. I will devote my ALL my attention and love to her. I would never contemplate a break-up unless really serious problem exist.

But somehow, I still have this sentimental side of me. Not that it will in any way affect my love to my girlfriend should I find one, but wouldn't this emotional baggage somehow makes the love less than 100%?

爱爱爱这东西
到底有什么了不起
la la la 我问自己
爱爱爱这东西
到底有什么了不起

bye bye bye
bye这个游戏

Are I alone in this thinking or is everyone like that?

I wonder.

爱是个什么东西?
我一直问我自己

爱有什么了不起?
那才是真理
有没有都活下去

爱是个什么东西?
我还在问我自己

爱有什么了不起?
我不能回答

我不能回答自己

lowtide blogged @
9:57 pm



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