Thursday, January 29, 2009
Conviction is all you need
If something is what you
deduced instead of what you
really know, then don't act as if it's the truth lah.
When people asked you if that is really the truth, what do you do?
Admit that you are not sure of the source, you lose face. (or you
THINK you'll lose face)
So what do you do? Swallow your saliva, cover your mind, shut down your conscience for that split moment, then look at people forcefully, confidently in the eye, and say: "Yes, it's true."
Come on lah, if you're not the primary source, don't act like one lah. If you're the secondary source, at least quote who you heard it from lah.
Spreading tales about other people, talking as if they are the absolute truth, how does it help you?
You're entitled to your opinions, you have the right to make conversations interesting. But passing off opinions as facts (and convincing others they are indeed the latter) is surely over the line.
Come on. You do not need to make others look bad to make yourself look good. What's the point?
Lying to achieve one's agendas, intented harm or not, harms.
However much 'critical thinking' we've been taught, sadly, so many people still fall into the trap of the 'convincing'.
Like George Bush right? All he needed to do was to behave, sound, look damn convinced about the WMD in Iraq (it's not the truth btw), and the war was authorised and supported.
The first time the boy cried wolf, people came to help.
Through time, stupid shepherds will remain, but like the story, people do indeed learn their lessons.
If the wolf really strikes, don't cry when nobody believes you.
lowtide blogged @
4:45 pm
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Talk
In sociology, we learnt about communication between people.
What I remembered deeply was that in any social group (either 1-to-1 or many-to-many), there is a need for all parties to be engaged. By being engaged I mean, all are both listeners, and talkers. This is especially so in an 1-to-1 relationship, as there are no free-riders in this configuration of social group, both speaking out and listening are important. Once one party feels that he/she listens too much and share too little or vice versa, the balance is spoilt, and that social 'circle' will not be a continous one.
When one tries too hard to focus everything on himself: attention, jokes, topics, acheivements etc, inevitably, people will feel that they are listening too much, and being listened to too little.
So stop focusing everything on yourself. Don't making every sentence of OTHER PEOPLE'S conversations to link to your OWN experiences.
It's ok to share, it's ok to talk about yourself. But if you do that EVERYTIME, everyone will just get mega-pissed, and stop giving you the attention you crave. Then you'll try harder, and piss more, and get lesser. Then try harder, and.. You get the idea.
Everyone craves for attention, everyone craves for recognition. But the more you share a lack of genuine interest for other's thoughts and experiences, and merely wanting to link to share YOUR views at EVERY SINGLE instance, given EVERY SINGLE opportunity, the less you'll get, trust me.
If you want people to listen to you, learn to listen first. If you want people to be interested to listen to what you say, be interested in listening to what they say first. The more you neglect the latter, the less you'll get in the former.
In this group of people, there are 2 kinds. One is the non-charismatic one, whatever he says, as much as people hope to listen, due to him trying too hard to share and trying too little to listen, people usually don't respond to his comments, and give them the cold treatment. The other one is charismatic enough to make people laugh, to make people listen to him. But once the laughter is gone, so what? Due to the lack of to-and-fro, the relationship becomes superficial, and beyond the laughters, people are usually less interested in the content of the nice 'speeches'.
Why am I saying all these? Because I feel that as wicked as it sounds, these people really make me not want to hear them speak, despite the 'nice' me saying I should.
lowtide blogged @
2:09 am
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Adapting
I read many of my friend's blogs.
It seems that everyone is trying to do the same thing - adapting.
My friends coming back from exchange - from Sweden, Korea, USA, Canada, UK etc. My fellow stay-in-NUSers. Like everyone, is trying or perhaps struggling even, to adapt back to NUS life.
It hasn't been easy, I have to stay.
If me, someone who was in NUS mugging for exams only like 2mths + ago, still feels lost at the current situation, I can't imagine those of my friends.
Well, yes, I'm still quite in the Anti-Social mode now.
I think it's like that bah. Especially people like us who have been used to the Arts Club, like seeing so many friends in the clubrooom, it's as if whoever we see, we can kinda strike a conversation with, and kinda be happy about it. It's like, when we are involved in the projects etc etc, the topics will seem endless bah. Either about our individual projects, or about the people involved (i.e. bitching).
Right now, especially so when we step into the club room, suddenly this place holds not much for us already. It is a place we contributed (and massively) before, a place we met, we worked, we mugged, we stayed over, we argued, we discussed, we celebrated, we laughed, we cried, we bitched, we chatted, and we organised outings etc etc. But now, honestly and sadly, it has become an empty shell with nothing but memories. We don't feel we have a stake in things anymore.
I don't why. Is it because that when we're into year 3, we focused more on academics? Those who fight to do honours. Those who fight to maintain their current classes of honours. Or is it because, we are mostly staying in school now, so we tend to retreat to our rooms more? Or is it, as I mentioned, because we don't feel that we have a 'place' in it anymore?
I don't know, I'm not sure. I just know that, last time, whenever I step into clubroom, I can easily find a glut of people for me to chit chat, it's really almost ANYONE.
Now, when I take the exceptional step of stepping into the clubroom, I usually find a few lonely souls in there. It's like the economic recession you know?
Less people in -> People expects less people in -> Even less people go in -> Nobody goes in
Is it possible to do something about it? I hope I can.
But me myself, I'm guilty of that. Because I see the clubroom in such a state now, I tend to retreat back to my room, more often than not. It does not help when I have 2 science modules, so the time spent in Arts will be significantly less.
I kinda like the solitude, but I kinda miss the good old days as well.
We should do something about it. shouldn't we? It's some of our friends' last sem btw.
lowtide blogged @
11:40 pm
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
First 10 days in school
Well, seeing people update their blogs make me wanna update mine, but i do not have exactly a topic in mind.
School started, but to me it hasn't really. Of course, the first two weeks, for me, is more transitional. I'm still kinda in the holidays mood, mainly hiding in my room and using my laptop, more or less the same thing I'll do at home during the hols. Whenever I go for lectures, it's more of a GTM (going through motion), than me actually feeling that I'm studying.
Same as the last sem, I think the feeling of the semester starting only when the first graded test/assignment starts, as by then I would have to force myself to be on top on things, rather than just GTM.
As said on my msn nick, I'm still used to the 10+ hrs sleep schedule, and I can't seem to get enough sleep. Either I'm really getting old or what. Next time work how sia?
Tuition also restarted - Well, I love the money, to be honest, and I quite like teaching the kids, but it gets more and more tiring each time you continue. I have to tell myself it's something that's part of my life, rather than something optional. If not, I'll keep being tired about it.
I wanna run twice a week, do plenty of chin-ups. Come on, the bloody SRC is just opposite your room!
Oh, I joined up with the Foodhunt recce on Sat. It's quite good! Other than the lack of directional sense by them haha, they were daring people in the comm, and I see it in them that they were willing to try asking stalls, even if it wasn't in the last year's list. Keep it up! For now, I feel the project is in safe hands, do not disappoint me please! Make it a successful one, and in your heart, the project is yours to keep =)
Had a slight chat with bev while the rest were approaching the stalls. Hope the juniors can now understand what the seniors think, and be more willing to ask us to help out =)
On Sunday, I had my paternal side's reunion dinner (we always eat early). Well, it's good to see everyone again. Somehow still, it feels weird, but it's good to kinda catch up with one another. It's the imaginary/real kinship that keeps the bond, but well, in real life, we're all leading our own individual lives. Weird feeling.
Anyway, it's not too bad a start of the year, but I'm still adapting to the pace of the NUS rat race again. EC3304 (Econometrics II) is scary, but the rest seems pretty slack. Hope I can do really well! I do not want to miss out on the donated scholarship again.. I'm getting really broke. Sounds weird, but I still need to pull it up! Before all that, there is still the 'small matter' of CNY coming up, so well, collect more ang baos lor.
Hoping for a good sem ahead =)
lowtide blogged @
10:17 am
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Bit is a kopi uncle.
Picture explains everything.
lowtide blogged @
11:26 pm
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Back to Bunk, Follow me
Moved into my room yesterday.
Again using the 'touching the deathnote book' example, memories suddenly flooded back into my mind, with many of the good memories, struggles, quality time, splendid rest time, anime, games, term papers, mugging coming back.
With the clothes, toiletries, electrical applicances and stationery up, the room has the look of last sem.
One thing's new though! I decided to try out a new furniture arrangement for the room =)
(the tv's not back yet, it would be cosy and complete soon!)
ps. Red Cliff 2 was good! Having given up that the show WOULD NOT follow the orignal story's plot, it was far more enjoyable this time round. The burning of the ships scenes were superb, way better than the original ROTK (China one)! Being a massive ROTK fan since primary school, it is a must-watch, since this battle is the grandest of them all in ROTK. And I admit I'm sadist, I like to see war films with arrows through chests, explosives blowing up people, and spears poking through hearts. (as long as I know it's not real, it's ok for me, heh)
lowtide blogged @
7:47 pm
