Tuesday, August 28, 2012
49 but not happy
I just don't know what to do anymore. Reached a stage where there's a need to climb higher, but how to do that when it has never been lower? Please don't talk of all these lofty aims when you can't even get the basics right. What's the point of being different, if the point is just to be different? What's the point of pretending to be happy/rich/special/different, when underneath all that are rotten foundations? What is the purpose of life? To gather and consume as many materialistic goods as fast as possible, or to focus on building relationships with everything else just a bonus and facilitator?
I may make it big one day, I may perhaps live a better life. But what will not change is me, who gets more satisfaction with intellectual stimulus, with relationship stimulus, and with making the lives of others better. In an already stressful world, why bother to add stress to oneself, pretending to be something one is not, then losing what one actually is? Is there a need to have eyes of envy on others? Or are contentment, and having close relationships the most important things in life? What's the point of lifeless materialistic goods when lively beings are being neglected?
It's not that I can't enjoy the finer things in life. But if under the pretext that relationships aren't solid, if under the premise that one is stressing out just to get them, then there is no point. Absolutely no point.
Why live for the envy of others, when you can be the envy of yourself?
lowtide blogged @
12:20 am
