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Saturday, February 13, 2010


Money money

Having asked around for prices and looked at my finances, perhaps having a big grad trip is not a viable option.

After my last paper on 29th April, technically I'll still need money to survive 3 months until the start of August, when I should be getting my first paycheque.

And knowing my spending patterns (which I'm not really willing to scrimp and save on the little things) and perhaps me needing to buy some new office clothes/bags/pants for work, I don't think I have a lot to play around.

Yeah, for other people's grand plans, I would be happy for them. Of course, sometimes I do wonder where do they have these massive 3-10k's from, but well, I shall work around my means, rather than thinking about other things. I'll just look at some weekend getaways, and of course, try to explore certain parts of Singapore I'm usually not willing to spend on.

Compared to some of my friends, I feel lucky. At least for now my family does not really need me to work to survive, and at least for the short term, I'm working to support myself (my contribution to the family is optional, save for that housing debt). There are friends whose families need them to work asap, or whose parents keep taking huge amounts from them, so at least I'm lucky in that aspect.

And at least I have a job already, I do not need to spend time, effort and energy looking for jobs, writing essays or going for interviews. And as I know exactly when would I start work, I can actually plan what I want to do already, despite not really having the finances to go for the higher level ones.

Perhaps no matter where you are in life, there will be people better off than you, and people worse off than you. As I go back to a very Buddhist way of thinking, it is the mismatch of desires and realities that makes one unhappy. Instead of having hopes that realities will match my growing desires, I shall learn to curb my desires, and be content with what I have.

Compared to my primary, secondary and jc days, I'm in much better shape already. To me, being able to slurge on the food you like to eat, movies you wanna watch, clothes you wanna wear, taxi rides when you're lazy, entertainments when you're bored, having my own laptop, with not much worries about finances being tight - that is already way better than last time, and I am very blessed indeed.

To be able to afford the more 'expensive' things in life, perhaps I should take a step back, put my head down, work hard as a young adult, before I can say I fully deserve all these.

I shall keep my desires in check, and think of them only when I can fully, and most importantly, safely afford them.

Now the last part: think of where I wanna go, or what I wanna do with the insurance savings money that I've saved since NS.

P.S. It felt good spending my scholarship money (I would like to think I've 'earned' it, even though I haven't really) to buy new year clothes/oranges/foodstuff for my own father and supporting him little by little in his financial distress - this kind of money spent is more meaningful than any splurge-in-a-few-days escapade. Yes, the ability to make your loved ones happy in little ways through money definitely yields more utility than the unnessary things. And of course with bigger things like quality healthcare, comfortable living, and better meals for the family, it's time to learn to work hard, and learn to enjoy the difference you can make to others' lives, rather than just your own =)

P.P.S 5th time! Of course, this means nothing if I fail to get an A-, but this is a boost to me nonetheless. This one's especially hard as it is in year 4, with the cream left, and with such difficult content.

Happy New Year everyone! =)

lowtide blogged @
5:34 pm



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